SAVING MY PENNIES FOR...

I'm saving my pennies for two big ticket items: a new camera and a Garmin Forerunner.

In the meantime, I've decided that I do need to reward myself with little things. Two items that I intend to purchase in the coming days...

1. a "Marathon Mama" t-shirt. I feel I have earned the right to own and (proudly) wear one of these.

2. a Bondi Band. Only problem... there are so many colors to choose from. Decisions. Decisions.

2010 GOALS

I'm a focused and determined little lady. 

I thrive on structure, routine, discipline, and at least seven hours of uninterrupted sleep each night.


Setting goals is important to/necessary for me.

I need to know where I am going and how I am going to get there.


I have spent numerous hours since the beginning of the month/year/decade thinking out, organizing, and laying out my goals for the new year. I know what I want to accomplish, I know why I want to do it, and I have a plan to get there.

Yet I am so freaking nervous about putting my goals out there.


What if I fail to achieve a goal? 

Oh...the horror, the disappointment, the embarrassment. 


SHUT UP ALREADY!

Without further excuses, here are my goals for 2010:
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HEALTH:

1. run 1000+ miles
2. run four races of differing lengths - 10k, 10 miler, 1/2 marathon, and marathon
3. do strength training twice each week (includes abs)
4. run a sub-4 hour marathon; sub-2 hour 1/2; and a 10k under 50 minutes

5. lose 10 pounds
6. lose the tummy/pooch above my c-section line (am I the only woman who had a c-section that cannot get rid of the fat?)



SCHOOL:
1. develop dissertation topic by end of February
2. have dissertation committee assembled by end of March
3. submit general research plan for May meeting
4. pass dissertation proposal defense by September 1st
5. schedule dissertation defense by June 2011
6. finish PhD program by September 1, 2011
7. complete my course-work by August 2010 
8. secure an external research grant for dissertation research by August 2010



PERSONAL WELL-BEING:
1. read a book for fun each month
2. read two books with D
3. go out for coffee with a friend or alone at least once a month
4. pay for at least one massage
5. go to bed before 11pm on school nights


FINANCIAL:
1. pay myself for mommy-share days (I'm watching a friend's child one day a week and she in turn is watching K one day; this cuts down seriously on our nanny expenses)
2. with saved $, buy the new camera I've been eyeing for months and put at least $2000 into my IRA

REACH GOALS:
1. qualify for the Boston Marathon
2. train for an IronMan
3. get a real job






 

SUCCESSFUL CRAIGSLIST WEEKEND

It was a great weekend to sell things on craigslist. We sold a stroller and one of those backpacks to carry a kid within a matter of minutes. Two families arrived at our house ON TIME yesterday afternoon, took a quick look at the merchandise, and paid with cash. Sweet. And it looks like we have someone interested in buying a diaper genie, which we don't need because we're all crunchy and using reusable diaper. One more thing gone!

We also got rid of my papasan chair. We ended up giving it away. Although the cushions were new, the bamboo frame was broken and duct-taped together a la MacGyver. A nice couple, expecting twin boys in the coming weeks, picked it up and was so excited about it.

It was such a successful weekend I am regretting not reposting the cat on craigslist. Maybe we could have offloaded him, too. Maybe next week.

We've offered our glider/rocker to friends. If they don't claim it in the next day, we'll be posting a white glider with blue cushions on craigslist.

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Today: I'm at home with the K. Our nanny had surgery on Friday and is home recovering. Today is domestic day: laundry, baby food making, errands, mopping, and ironing.

Tomorrow: I'm at home with the K, as scheduled. It will be a work day: scheduling meetings, finishing reading list for course syllabus, and registering for classes next fall. Also need to renew some library books.

Yesterday: in addition to successful craigslisting, I went out for a 'long' run yesterday. It was my first 5 mile run since I quit running last spring. It went well. K was with me. We had a lot of fun together! We did the run at Haines Point along the Potomac River. It was lovely and so flat. I do miss The Awakening statue that used to sit at the tip of the peninsula. Why did they have to go and move it?

THE COSTS OF BREASTFEEDING

A little bit about our family: we eat vegan, use reusable bags for shopping, recycle, and buy things second-hand. We don't own a TV. We use reusable diapers and have only purchased a total of 11 onesies for our baby. EVERYTHING else was either a gift, hand-me-down, or bought second-hand. We use glass baby bottles and are making all of our baby's food.

And I'm really proud of the fact that our little one has only had one bottle of formula EVER. And that was her first night in the hospital. I was too sick and pumped full of drugs to take care of her.

When I was pregnant we decided that we wanted to breastfeed our baby for several reasons: 1) it is what is best, in terms of health, for her; 2) it is natural and a wonderful way for a baby to bond with his/her mom; and 3) it is WAY less expensive than buying formula. Our goal was and still remains to breastfeed the little one until she is one. Then it is ALL OVER.

The other day I was standing in line in the grocery store behind a woman buying formula and realized just how expensive that stuff is. Seriously, that stuff costs A LOT. If we were to buy organic, non-dairy formula it would cost us somewhere between $400-600 per month. That's a lot of money. Breastfeeding is definitely the way to go if you want to save cash. But there are some costs associated with breastfeeding. And they have been weighing on me this past week...

First, its a time commitment and a burden to a mom. You are responsible for milk at every meal and for every snack. This means (at the beginning) sitting down for upwards of an hour EIGHT times a day to get enough food in her little belly. Six months later and she is still nursing six, sometimes seven times a day. Things do move along a little faster these days, but still it is a time commitment.

And then there is pumping. If we're not together for a feeding, I must pump. I.HATE.IT. There is something demoralizing about pumping; something so wrong. I hate it. I hate carrying my pump to school every day. Hate cleaning all the little parts. Hate spending close to an hour a day in a little bathroom filling bottles with more milk. I also hate that I have to get up early each morning and pump after she has eaten (for my own personal comfort). And I really hate that basically you cannot do a single thing while pumping, except pumping.

Another cost associated with breastfeeding is the steep learning curve. It is hard work for the mom and the baby. It took us close to three months to finally get a common groove. It was hard work at first. Had it not been for Laura, our nurse at the hospital, or my mom, who made me tea to drink during the early days and posted notes telling me to relax while trying to get the baby to feed, I think I would have given up before the first month was over. It takes a lot of time and commitment on the part of the mother to get her baby to nurse, to not fall asleep while nursing, to drink from both sides, to get full feeding EVERY time, etc...

And finally, there are physical costs of nursing. Nursing changes the shape of your body. I have never been so top-heavy before in my life. My center of gravity may be forever different and I'm not sure I like that. Nursing is also physically draining. A nursing mom needs an additional 500 calories a day. I just can't keep up. I continue to lose weight (probably has something to do with the vegan diet). My current goals are to stay as hydrated as possible each day and maintain my current weight (which BTW is 12 pounds less than what I weighted at my first prenatal visit). Some people might think losing all this weight is awesome, but I'm worried about what is going to happen when I stop nursing her. I can eat like a carefree teenager right now. Will I ever be able to go back to a disciplined healthy eater?

More physical costs of nursing rear their ugly heads at the beginning... there were the sores and dry skin. There were cuts and blood. It was uncomfortable. They soon went away, but a month later her teeth started to come in and the biting began. The cuts and sores were back. This time with an infection. MISERABLE. It is a dangerous job being a nursing mother!

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm happy and proud of our decision to breastfeed the little one. But after six months of this, I've come to realize that the decision to breastfeed is complicated; definitely not black and white. There are costs and benefits to it. I think the costs far outweigh the benefits, but there still are costs. To say the least, I have learned a lot and been through a lot these past six months. As the next six months roll on by, I'm going to try to treasure all of my nursing moments. And I am looking forward to the day where I can pack up my pump and put it away for a long, long, long time!

HEALTH INSURANCE

Health insurance is complicated and confusing. And I'm not talking about whether we need a universal healthcare coverage plan in this country (I'm not going there; at least not today). I'm talking about my personal health insurance plan. It is CRAZY what I can and cannot do under my current insurance plan. For instance, I can get prescriptions from my PCP (that's insurance speak for 'primary care physician') filled at the school's pharmacy. But prescriptions from a doctor outside that school's medical system cannot be filled there; they have to go to a partner pharmacy that the insurance company accepts. Additionally, all of my lab tests have to be preformed by one lab and analyzed them. No exceptions.

The particular laboratory I'm required to go to by my insurance has been hounding me for weeks for unpaid bills. This blows my mind. I go the lab they recommend, I check (before going to said lab) to be sure they'll cover the cost of the test, and then I follow through at the specified lab. What more can I do? Why does the lab call me saying that I have thousands of dollars worth of unpaid bills?

My most recent message from the laboratory said that they will start refusing to provide services for me (and the baby when he/she arrives) if I don't pay my outstanding bills. Obviously this caught my attention...

I called the lab this morning to see what the problem was (and was even ready to set up a payment plan if in fact my insurance wouldn't cover my prenatal blood glucose test or blood work). Much to my surprise (and DELIGHT) the laboratory had entered my insurance information into their system incorrectly. They made the correction to my insurance policy number and, BAM, I owed only $12 for nine months worth of laboratory work.

As grateful as I am for my insurance, I am curious what people without insurance do? Just visiting a doctor is expensive. I've had the most uncomplicated pregnancy known to mankind (knock on wood) and still the bills (co-pays) have been more than I expected. And the costs for the actual procedures, which are mostly covered by insurance, are outrageous. What is one to do if they don't have insurance? The answer is beyond me...

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Baked today: lemon bread (using leftover lemons from David's catering venture last weekend) and marinated tofu.

Currently: at the library taking a break from studying statistics. One more chapter to read before Wednesday's study group.

FOUR GROCERY STORE DAY

I set out to do our weekly grocery shopping today around 1pm. After stops at three local grocery stores, I arrived home around 3pm. I just made my last stop at the local market to pick up a gallon of milk. Making today my first ever FOUR grocery store day.

Usually, I'm a two grocery store shopper. I get most of my pantry items, eggs, milk, personal hygiene products, and household cleaners at Target. You just cannot beat their prices (but it should be noted that the price of eggs went up by 40 cents this past week; still they have the best prices around). I then go to the nicer grocery store to get produce and other items that are not sold at Target (such as hummos). Today I made an extra trip to the organic market to purchase some bulk items to make homemade granola. That makes three grocery stores.

I had to go to the fourth store to get the milk (and laundry detergent that was on sale) because I purchased too much at Target (including a new bathmat and towels for our newly finished second bathroom) and the other stores. The thought of walking home with a backpack full of food and bathroom accessories and FOUR bags of groceries PLUS a gallon of milk was more than I could handle. My swollen ankles/feet just couldn't take it. So I opted to delay purchasing the milk until this evening. Having just arrived home with my milk, I realized it was my fourth grocery store stop of the day. Amazing what I will do (and the lengths I will walk) to get the products that I want at the cheapest prices.

My biggest complaint: At each of the stores, I used my own reusable grocery bags (and a backpack at Target). And not one of the store employees helped me pack my bags. It's like store employees are afraid of the reusable bag or maybe during their training they were not taught how to properly put food items into them. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? The will double and even triple bag a gallon of milk for the woman behind me, but they'll make me (the VERY pregnant lady) bag all of my groceries. It really ticks me off. I expect the same service as any other customers. Just because I say, "I brought my own bags," it does not mean I don't want any help bagging my groceries. In fact, I'd like some help; right now, I need the help. Next time, I think I'm going to just ask for it. Or I'm going to start complaining...

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Basement: our construction project is finished (minus a fresh coat of paint). I love the new bathroom and my functional laundry room is a dream come true.

What I did today: other than grocery stopping, I made a veggie lasagna and several pounds of granola. Does anyone know if granola can be frozen? I also was able to serve as a proxy for David in a Census survey on employment and volunteer activities (I love participating in surveys).

Tomorrow: off to school to meet with my comps study group. We're growing through one-third of a semester's worth of biostats in an hour.

THE PRICE OF PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION

I'm a huge fan of public transportation here in Washington DC. We live a short three minute walk from both a train station and two different bus lines. Neither David nor I drive to work/school, and we never have. We rely on Metro for most of our transportation needs and are seriously thinking about selling our car (if you want/need a 2000 VW Jetta with approximately 60,000 miles let me know).

That said...

The price to ride metro - both the trains and buses - increased at the beginning of the month and I'm frustrated. This is the third fare hike since I moved to the DC area. The base train fare increased from $1.35 per ride to $1.65 per ride. Bus fare only increased for passengers paying with cash (if you use your SmarTrip card, bus fare is still $1.25). The price increase has had a dramatic impact on my commuting budget. During the fall semester, it cost me $2.10 to travel between the Georgia Ave/Petworth train station and the College Park station. Now it costs $2.50. And if I take the 3:30 train home from Baltimore, I have to get off at the Greenbelt station (b/c it is an express train that skips the College Park and Riverdale stations) and it costs me $3.05. Unbelievable! A 15 minute ride, five stops, costs me more than $3.00.

In an effort to save as much money as possible (in light of the fare hike), I have made the switch from the MARC train monthly pass, which included a 15% student discount, to the MARC/Metro Transit Link card. The card gives me unlimited rides on Metro buses and trains, as well as unlimited trips to/from Baltimore --- for JUST $230.00 per month. Ultimately it is cheaper than driving the 65 miles to Baltimore everyday and more environmentally friendly to take public transit. Plus I can study, sleep, and eat on the train. However the price of my trips to/from the MARC station on the Metro trains is irritating. I'd rather spend my money on trips, home-improvements, or a good bottle of wine than on commuting...

THE VALUE OF A HOMEMADE GIFT = PRICELESS

Maybe it's a sign that I'm getting older; maybe it was the scrapbook my mom made me after our trip to London and Paris; maybe it's that I was so touched when friends and family members put such effort into buying/making such thoughtful wedding gifts; maybe it's the Christmas plate that Grandma Smullin gives to be each year (and this year I received two plates - one new and one from HER collection); maybe it was the look on my parents' faces when I told them I designed our wedding scrapbook.

What it is, I'm not sure. But I love to give (and receive) homemade gifts. They are invaluable to both the receiver and the giver.

Today is David's birthday. He's definitely not a "stuff" guy. We lead a fairly simple lifestyle, and definitely are NOT the couple who is waiting for the next great kitchen gadget/appliance or the larger flat screen TV to be released. Not knowing what to give to David, I decided to bake. He's a huge fan of a sour dough jalapeno made by a bakery here in DC. Unfortunately, it is a hard loaf to come by. So I decided to make my own.



That along with some fresh flowers, a nice bottle of wine, and peanut-butter filled pretzels from the Trader Joes made the perfect gift. Note: the bread didn't rise as much as I would have liked. I'm blaming the cold weather. I'll try it again in the spring.

In addition to making birthday gifts, I'm also working on several baby gifts. Below are two hats I just completed for my friend, Jen. Her daughter is due in March. The pink hat can be worn right away; the black and gold one (for the little Steelers fan) is a little bigger so it can be worn next fall during football season. I'm planning to add a gold flower to the black and gold hat to make it a little more girly.



As for receiving homemade gifts, David and I were surprised to find this...



in our dinning room when we returned from our New Year's trip to NYC. Our friend, Ted, made it for us. And he surprised us by moving it into our place while we were out of town. It is a beautiful piece and a welcome addition to our dining room. I feel so blessed to have such thoughtful (and talented) friends who would make such an effort for us. Everytime I look at it, I think about what a great friend Ted (and his wife, Martha) are to David and me. It will be treasured for years to come.

NEW BEGINNINGS

It's a new year. A new semester is about to begin. And it's a new look for SLOWLY GROWING OLD TOGETHER. After much time away from my blog, I decided it needed a new look/feel and A LOT of focus. I've spent the past three and a half weeks of my winter vacation thinking a lot about focus; not just for my blog, but focus in my life, relationships, activities, and (maybe most importantly) future dissertation research.

The question that I continue to ask myself is: what does it mean to be healthy, wealthy, and wise?

HEALTH
Having recently turned 30 (or celebrated my 30th candycane festival, as Jill has named it) and having a bit of a health scare over the holidays, has forced me to think a lot about my physical health. Diet, exercise, sleep, seeking medical care when needed, and good products to keep away wrinkles and age spots are all important. But I also want a healthy marriage, healthy relationships with my friends, and a healthy community to live in and be apart of.

WEALTH
As a graduate student living off a student stipend, the word wealth is almost funny to say! However, I have been blessed with so much in terms of material goods and I am so grateful for the stipend and scholarship I receive. How do I steward what I have been given well? And not think that I need/deserve more? David and I took a Crown Ministries Financial Bible Study class last spring, which revolutionized the way we look, talk, and budget our money. We've made a budget for the new year and are eager to track our spending and stick to our budget.

But what I have and how much I make is not what makes wealthy...In addition to my money and stuff, I have a wealth of friends and family members who I love. I have a wealth of skills and abilities that I need to put to good use. I want to learn to steward all of these things (money, talents, abilities, relationships) well and be appreciative for all that I have been given.

WISE
As a PhD student, I'm taking in more information than I know what to do with, and I love it. Achieving my goal of getting into graduate school (again) and working towards my PhD has been life-changing. David says I'm blossoming, and I'm beginning to understand what he means. I love what I am studying and am eager to earn more. I want to make the most of my educational experience and become the best epidemiologist I can be. I also want to learn to be a better wife, friend, listener, marathon runner, and hostess, among other things. Wisdom isn't just taught at school.

And so, as I slowly grow old together with David, I hope to share with you my experiences, observations, and lessons learned as I attempt to uncover the true meaning of what it means for me to be healthy, wealthy, and wise.