AN ABD PhD STUDENT'S PRAYER

Dear God,

My proposal defense is schedule for Monday at 1pm. That is approximately 30 hours from now. Between then and now, I need to make revisions to my slides, add references to said slides and get all of my slides reviewed/approved AGAIN by my adviser. Additionally, I need to buy new panty-hose and decide which necklace to wear - pearls or black beads. I also need to sit through my final class of the semester, host a dinner party at home and deliver 12 plates of cookies to neighbors.

God, I am busy.

I am stressed out.

I'm thinking maybe I should just quit now and go shopping (just kidding, sort of).

God, I have many requests related to my proposal defense. For efficiency's sake (mine, not yours, of course), I'm going to go with list, complete with bullet points.

Lord, please...

- help me to think clearly;
- help me to speak clearly;
- help me to not talk too fast;
- help me to answer questions with an ounce of intelligence;
- give my committee mercy and compassion towards me;
- do not let it snow or there be a snow delay on Monday;
- do not allow the lights to go off or the computer to freeze up during my presentation;
- have Professors MT, MB, and CA not show up - give them busy afternoons so they do not attend my proposal defense;
-help me to remember all the paperwork that needs to be signed by my committee;
- prevent me from spilling my coffee or lunch on my dress-up outfit;
- make sure I pronounce "POLYMORPHISMS" correctly every time I say it;
- ensure that my committee enjoys and appreciates all the homemade goodies I am bringing for them;

and, finally,

- be sure that I pass with flying colors and get approval to conduct my final defense in six month.

Thank you, God.

And it isn't too much to ask, please help me to sleep well the next two nights, not contract the nasty eye infection K had yesterday, keep my voice, and not get a huge zit on my nose or forehead.

Amen.