just.like.that.

It was over.

Finished.

Never to be done again.

K is done nursing. I have been stressing for weeks over how I was going to wean her. She was only nursing twice a day - morning and night - but she seemed so in to it. Bedtime nursing was part of her routine. Would she go to bed without her nightly fix?

Then last Saturday night she just stopped. We sat down after her bath and she refused to nurse. Her nose was a little stuffy and she was fighting an ear infection, but she'd been nursing through it. I was shocked when she just flat out refused me. To calm her crying and her repeated signing* for milk, I got a bottle out, warmed some soy milk, and gave it to her. She downed the bottle, handed it to me, put her head on my shoulder and fell asleep. I put her in her crib.

And that was that.

She's officially weaned.

I was slightly traumatized by the whole situation. My baby is making decisions for herself; expressing who she is and what she wants and doesn't want. She was fully satisfied holding the bottle by herself. She is becoming little miss independent.

I'm sad that nursing her is over. But I'm also so happy. Nursing is a blessing and a curse. It is healthy and a wonderful bonding experience, but when you're the only one who can do it it can be overwhelming (and painful, especially at the beginning and when those little teeth come in). I didn't think I would enjoy nursing K as much as I did. And I'm sad that she brought it to an abrupt close. I wasn't prepared. She was in control; not me.

Thankfully I have the emotional capacity to handle this transition and to deal with it. Maybe it's better this way... it was easy on her (but not on poor me).

K is 100% on soy milk these days. And she still likes to cuddle in the morning, before naps, and at bedtime. Cuddling makes me very happy. I'll take her laying on my chest, pulling my hair, and drinking her milk any day.

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*signing - we have been using sign language with K for several months now. And it is wonderful. She lets us know when she wants "milk" and "more". She can also sign for "all done" and is quickly picking up on "please", which we have taught her so she stops whining/screaming when she wants something out of her reach.

1 year check-up: K went in for her well check at 13 months. Little girl is still really little - weighing in at 17 lbs 4 oz. This puts her in the 5th percentile for weight. She's going to be sitting backwards in her carseat for a long time. Otherwise she is healthy and developing nicely. She did have an ear infection diagnosed at her well check and is on some antibiotics. Her "fang" teeth and molars are all coming in right now. She's had a lot of Tylenol recently.